Thursday, June 08, 2006

What's in a name?

No.1 Iceland Addick Olafur Johansson

It's not such a happy time for us Iceland Addicks with our prime minister forced out of office, our currency collapsing and Iceland not in the World Cup. Also the fish catch has not been so good here in Grindavik. So to help me cheer up, Mr Wim Grant allowed me to write something in his blog.

When I came for my stay in England, I did not make the mistake of one Addick of confusing Charlton with Chorlton and thinking it was the Number 3 team in Manchester. But with the haddock theme that had attracted me in the first place, I thought that Charlton would be by the sea, not by the Thames River. But there was nothing in the name to make me think that.

But the names of some English football clubs are very confusing (not to mention the Scottish ones which have commentators mistakenly reporting that people are dancing in the streets of Raith, which I suppose is better than dancing in the streets of Total Network Systems). But I digress.

We are a republican country (as you know my wife's cousin is our president, he is also called Olafur) so when I came to England I wished to know which team the royal family supported. Once I heard there was a team called Queen's Park Rangers I thought this must be the Queen's own team, playing in the Great Park of Windsor, drawing on the park rangers with the Duke of Edinburgh barking instructions from the touchline. And as the Queen is Queen of Scotland I thought that she would also have a Scottish team, but I could not decide whether it was Queen's Park (without the Rangers) or Queen of the South, as she is from the south. But neither was true and all I learned was that your Queen Mother was a Gooner.

Now your Prince William supports Aston Villa and when I came to England and wanted to go there for a Charlton away game I looked on the map for the town of Aston and could not find it. Ah, I thought, this must be the personal team of an aristocrat playing in his Villa in the countryside. I was very disappointed when I found that Aston was a run down area of the city of Birmingham.

It is a long time since the Arsenal club moved from Woolwich and as they are about to move to a new stadium, surely now is the time to give them a proper geographic name and call them Islington Borough. Similarly, the Hotspur club of Tottenham could call themselves Haringey Borough to celebrate the borough in which they have their ground. And Fulham could be more accurately named Putney.

But surely the most misleading name of all is Crystal Palace? First, it gives a misleading impression of opulence, glamour and sophistication, the sort of club that Danny Murphy's wife would like to be seen at. Second, it is nowhere near the old Crystal Palace of the Great Exhibition that burnt down so many years ago.

So, please send me your suggestions for re-naming Crystal Palace and I will pass the best one on to Simon Jordan who is always pleased to hear from or about Charlton.


Blogger Steve0 said...

How about Norwood Knobheads United?

7:46 AM  

Post a Comment

<< Home